TV Review: Dark Matter (SPOILER FREE)

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Christ, I miss Space Operas; those stunning, camp, grandiose affairs. I yearn once again for cow-pat head aliens, intergalactic treaties and war. Planets ending in the word ‘Prime.’ Shakespearean dramas and philosophical discourses played out in a series of dimly lit corridors. Alien languages that sound like broken Estonian after you’ve had root canal surgery. And most importantly, a sense of boundless optimism; the idea that humanity (and other sentient life) is going places, exploring that boundless, beautiful frontier.

Until as a society we decided humanity was not THE SHIT, just, shit.

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The Gary Stu of Anime, Part 2

Kirigaya ‘Kirito’ Kazuto Aka The Black Swordsman, Aka the Twin Blade Swordsman, Aka Pussy-Magnet General

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Disclaimer: most of the verbal diarrhea below is entirely based on watching the first Sword Art Online anime, I couldn’t bring myself to watch Sword Art Online II. I could use this as a space to ramble on about how the pacing of SAO was god awful and its depiction of female characters infuriating… Regrettably, I shall try to keep my vitriol to a minimum.

It’s the year 2022 and virtual reality is no longer shit. A 14 year old school boy named Kirito spends copious amounts of time playing MMO games using a VR system called the ‘Nerve Gear.’ This becomes more than just a ‘pastime’ however, when Kirito and 10,000 other players are trapped inside the game Sword Art Online by evil game designer Peter Moly… Kayaba Akihiko. It’s a death game (definitely not overdone in Japan). Players cannot log out, and If you die in the game, your brain in reduced to mushy peas in real life. To escape, players must defeat the bosses on each floor of the floating castle Aincrad. I bet you can’t guess who become video game Moses!?

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